Establishing a Community

I LOVE being here.  I know that there are some of you reading this, having mixed emotions about that statement.  Excited that I am exactly where God wants me and sadden by the possibility of my being in a permanent state of here.  It's weird, that after the first full week of being in Southampton, I felt a real peace about the friendships and life I am building in this season.  My entire college career, I felt that I was suppose to be somewhere else, a real urge to just go.  There was always a goal.  If I just get through this term, this year, this degree plan, then I can go.  Now...I just want to be.  I have no endgame.

What does the dream look like?  Honestly, far better than I imagined or could ever put into words.  I get to rely on Jesus, totally dependent of the King of Kings and it is a major blessing.  Of course, I thankfully have the freedom and ability to do that anywhere, an aspect of the blessing is that God is gracious enough to allow me to do it in a place I love and always dreamed of going.  I am surrounded by brothers and sisters in Christ that desire to know Jesus more today than the day before.  It is mental to think of the passion that these men and women have to share the love,grace and mercy of Jesus Christ.  It is such an encouragement to hear what they are learning in his or her personal walk with Jesus, and the desire to serve Him in anyway that can glorify Him and advance His kingdom.

The authenticity at ABC is such an answer to prayers, but also a challenge for me to make sure that I am being as real with them as they are being with me.  I dislike talking about myself, if you have walked with me long enough, you know exactly what I mean.  I share enough to answer the question, but then deflect and tend to turn the conversation back to the other person.  I am more than happy to listen and give advice when necessary.  However, I am surrounded by a group of women that are not letting that happen.  Jules will often share how the Lord is teaching,challenging, and growing her. She is so passionate about what the Lord is doing in her life, I absolutely love hearing her speak, but typically she will end her conversation abruptly saying, "Anyway, what about you, mate?" I am seriously always caught off guard, but I love the fact that she wants me to share everything, not because she is nosy but she wants me to be comfortable and offer advice/help where she can. Jules genuinely wants to know where Jesus and I are in our walk and I am extremely grateful for her friendship. Recently, I was asked, "What are three things you like about yourself?"  Uhhhh....what?  While I tried changing the subject( several times according to Ruth,) I loved that question because it got me thinking about what negative attributes came to mind before the positive, how I see myself, and ultimately how I view the Creator.

While it hasn't even been a full month, my time in Denton seems like a a lifetime ago.  There are things and people I miss, but for the most part, I'm not homesick.  I feel a slight tinge of guilt in admitting that, but I am surrounded by people that teaching me how to love Jesus better, demonstrating that leadership resides in the humble acts of service, and showing me the grace freely given to all by the blood of Jesus on the Cross.  How can I not love it here?

Formation

Has it really been less than a week since I arrived in Southampton?  It feels like I have been here for ages.  The days are sort of blending in together and I am unsure if it is because of the jet lag or because I have done something everyday upon arrival.

Love.  As a leader, I think that sometimes we forget that love is the entire reason we have a relationship with a holy God.  In an abundance of love, He created us to walk along side Him.  When we sinned against Him, He still desired us enough to send His Son to die on the Cross in our place, so that we could be counted as righteous through the blood, death and resurrection of Christ.  These past two days have been excellent reminders that love is at the heart of our ministry, it is easy to begin to see Sunday as another work day, rather than a day to worship and have fellowship with other believers.  I find it fascinating that our ability to love is because He first loved us, so our love for Him is a mere reflection of His love, meaning He gets all the glory and it has absolutely nothing to do with us.  It is all about Jesus.

I wasn't quite sure what to expect Tuesday morning, heading to the Formation conference.  I envisioned team building exercises, and trust falls centering around talks of Jesus.  Yet, what I received was far better.  We arrive to a lunch of hot dogs(more like extra long vienna sausages), nearly fifty other men and women at the camp doing a similar program to Transform in churches all over England.  We get a schedule of the events of the days to come.  It is jam packed from nine in the morning to nine in the evening.  Divided into sections of meals, refreshments, and seminars throughout the day.  Reading the list of seminars, each better than the one previously read.  Into into spiritual leadership, Deepening your doctrine, Growing as a servant. Those are only to name a few.  Everything was Christ-centered.


I met so many great people at Formation.  Everyone got along, mixing and mingling with one another.  The group was so diverse; English, Welsh, Chinese, American(there was a couple from Colorado!), Australian.  Each praising Jesus, thanking Him for the grace we undeserving receive, but gratefully accept.  Despite a wicked case of jet lag, I refused to miss out on the opportunity to have Jesus talks with new friends, often staying up until midnight.  The first night, unpacking what predestination and free will mean, and the impacts either have.  Like many of those conversations, it was left with no definitive answer. The second night, drawing a crude map of the United States and naming off the states with the help of the other American couple.  It's great knowing that God calls so many people to take part of His plan.  We aren't essential, but greatly desired to partake, again what a relief knowing it has everything to do with Him and nothing to do with me.

I don't think there are words for me to accurately sum up everything about these past few days.  I am grateful for the opportunity of soaking up the knowledge and wisdom of more mature Christians.  It was amazing to simply relish in the grace of God, encouraged as each of us embark on a year of reliance and unknown, reminded that God knows the beginning, middle, and end of each story and what this year holds.

Southampton, UK

Well, it has been a few days since arrival. Actually, it's only been one but i feel as though it's been ages since I left the states.  Partly, because of the jet lag and partly, because everything that has gone on since landing in Heathrow.  I was greeted at the airport and immediately whisked away to the Tuck house, a family heavily involved at Above Bar and Transform.  The Tuck family is so welcoming and charming, I love chatting with them. After about an hour, we went to the 11 am morning service.  It is always interesting to see how different churches and cultures worship the same God.  I'm not particularly fond of the worship style but I feel that will change once I become accustomed.  I met so many people after that service, I hardly remember any of their names or faces.   A normal person would go to sleep after such a long flight, but I am not normal.

I had my first English meal after church. I ate gammon, which is ham, mashed potatoes and gravy, and parsnips. While I was anticipating bland food, it was quite flavorful and yummy. One stereotype busted! Actually, not really, because I have had bland food since then. Instead of going to sleep I went to the house I would be staying out, took a nap, and went back to Above Bar for an evening service.  The evening service was more my style. I met EVEN MORE people and had lovely conversations.  I finally went home and passed out.

I woke way earlier than expected, 7:30 in the morning. I was surprised. I unpacked my bags. I have a wardrobe, just like in Narnia! While unpacking I realized that I have very little clothing, it's amazing how little three suitcases hold when you a weight restriction. I took the bus into town. Now, let me just say, I know that English people drive on the "wrong" side of the rode, I was prepared for that, but  I still found my self having mini heart attacks when a car would turn into "on coming traffic." Also, the roads seem only wide enough to be one way, yet are two ways and have cars parked on the street. I feel that helps justify my heart attacks.  At church today we briefly discusses everything that Transform is about, what they desire out of the program and us.  I love how much Dan and Chris emphasize continual pursuit of our own relationship with Christ and how it's just as important to be poured into, as much as it is important to pour out.  There are three other Transform workers, Jules, Luke, and George. I believe that we get along great and will have tons if fun and adventures together.

On the way home, I had a chat with Jules about things The Lord may be challenging her in and how God provides blessings amidst struggles. It was a brief moment but I loved it, and it reminded me about all the Jesus centered discussion I had in Texas.  I got home and realized I forgotten to pack some essentials. Recalling a grocery store not far from where I live, I ventured off to the great unknown of Southampton! Ten minutes into my walk, I feared that I went the wrong way, but, I already committed to the path so I trekked on. Thankfully, I succeeded in finding Sainsbury. Once back home, I got to have a conversation with my best friend, Brittany Mercer. It was so nice to hear her voice and know that an ocean will not hinder the level of intimacy in our friendship.

The hospitality that I have received thus far is such a gift. I have witnessed Jesus in everything that has happened in the last few days, confirming that this is where Jesus meant for me to be.  Although I do miss everyone and knowing exactly what a person is saying, or knowing that when I say outlet, the person knows I mean a wall socket.  These past few days have drawn me closer to Him, so I can only image what eleven months of utter reliance( not that I won't be relying on Him after that, hopefully, you know what I'm trying to convey) can bring forth to my walk.